Step 1: Check in with yourself 

Example phrases: 

• What behaviour I feel uncomfortable with and what boundary do I want to set with this person? 

• Do I feel safe saying something directly and if so, do I feel more comfortable saying something in person or via message?  

Step 2: Start with a clear and respectful boundary 

Example phrases: 

• "Thanks, but I’m not interested in anything beyond being classmates/friends." 

• "I appreciate that you want to talk about this situation, but I’m not comfortable talking about this. In future, please communicate to the clubs social media or email for club related matters.  

• I feel uncomfortable with you continuing to contact me/approach you. I would like for you to please stop contacting/approaching me.  

Note: Be direct and avoid over-explaining. You don’t need to justify your decision. 

Step 3: Reinforce the boundary in an explicit way if the person chooses to not respect it  

Example phrases: 

• "I’ve already said I’m not interested. Please don’t contact me again." 

• "I feel uncomfortable with you continuing to contact/approach me after I have asked you to stop. I am asking you again to stop.”  

• "I’m asking for no further contact. Please respect that." 

• “I have already requested that you stop contacting me through these channels. You are harassing me, please stop contacting me and contact the club directly. “  

 

Step 4: End contact if needed (Remember, you don’t owe anyone continued contact)  

• Block them on social media or messaging apps. 

• Avoid engaging with any follow-up messages. 

• You have the right to remove yourself from a situation that makes you feel unsafe or uncomfortable. 

Step 5: Get support (remember you can get support at any stage)  

If the unwanted contact continues, becomes threatening, or you feel uncomfortable or unsafe: 

• Get Support: If you need support regarding Gendered Violence, you can contact UNSW Gendered Violence Response Team for support and advice or make a report to the Arc Clubs Complaints Portal  

• Report the behaviour: Options can include reporting to the police, or if connected to UNSW, report to UNSW Conduct and Integrity and/or Arc Grievance Officer. You can also report via the Sexual Assault Reporting Option (SARO), even if you don’t want an informal investigation from the police. For example, you can report anonymously, or choose to list the person’s name in the report and to only be contacted if someone else reports the same person  

• Record evidence: Take notes of abusive, frightening or concerning things that have taken place. Record the date, time, location, and a description of what happened. This can help provide evidence of patterns of behaviour over time. You can keep notes in a diary or use Empower you app If you need someone to record this for you, the Be There app is a handy resource for bystanders. If you’re being contacted online or by message, keep a copy (screenshots, texts).