You must have heard about the recent priceless artifacts that were stolen from the Louvre. As a huge history nerd, I was initially horrified. How could anyone do this to history itself? But then, of course, the ever-wonderful chaos of my brain kicked in, and I started thinking about which characters, from the countless shows I’ve watched, could best pull off a heist like this. 

So, I sat down, iced coffee in hand, and made my ultimate list of who could rob the Louvre. Not for money or power, but just the pure, chaotic fun of it. Taking a few artefacts from the Louvre is easy, they need a real challenge. A big one. The Mona Lisa, baby.

I’ve watched these shows way too many times. I know their weaknesses, their strategies, and their flair for drama. So, here’s my official list of characters who could actually pull off the most stylish, chaotic, and ridiculous art heist of all time.

The Undisputed Louvre Lords

If the Mikaelsons wanted to rob the Louvre, they wouldn’t even plan it. They’d just decide one night over wine, like, “Brother, Paris awaits.”

Klaus would do it purely out of spite. Not for money, not even for the art, just because someone once told him, “You can’t just steal the Mona Lisa.” And he’d definitely take that personally. He’d stroll into the Louvre like it’s his private gallery, casually compel every guard in the building, and probably monologue out loud about art being “the reflection of the eternal struggle between beauty and pain” while doing so.

Elijah, of course, would treat the whole heist like a diplomatic event. He’d wear a tux, call it “retrieving a family heirloom,” and somehow convince the staff that they are attending a charity gala. The man would pause MID-heist to straighten his tie. You just know he would.

Rebekah? She’d be the distraction. Glamorous, loud, and entirely too confident. She’d flirt her way past security and complain the whole time about Paris fashion. She’d do it for the thrill and maybe a new pair of Louboutins.

Freya is the MVP though. Alarms? Gone. Lasers? Vanished. Cameras? Offline. She’d be in the corner, muttering spells and sipping a coffee like it’s just another Tuesday. You cannot beat magic in a heist. It’s just not fair.

Kol would be pure chaos. He’d steal three extra paintings just because “they looked fun” and leave a taunting note behind. Kol’s the guy who’d grin into the security cameras while security scrambles.

And Finn? Poor Finn would try to lecture everyone about morality. He’d last five minutes before Klaus gets bored, daggers him, and literally hangs him in the museum as a new “art installation.” I can already hear Klaus saying, “Now that is a masterpiece.”

No questions asked, this family walks out without a scratch. They’d replace the Mona Lisa with a note that says “Yours truly, the Mikaelsons.” AND STILL WOULDN’T GET CAUGHT!!!

The Accidental Criminals

This team shouldn’t work. Like, at all. But the chaos would be too perfect to fail.

The chaos potential here is unmatched. Sheldon would claim it’s a “theoretical physics experiment” to test laser detection timing, Bernadette would roll her eyes, and Penny would be there because someone said “Paris” and “wine.”

Sheldon would have a 45-page plan printed, laminated, and colour-coded. Bernadette would do all the real work because, let’s face it, she’s the only competent one in the room. And Penny would somehow accidentally charm the entire Louvre staff, get VIP access, and not even realise she just helped steal the most famous painting in the world.

In the end, Sheldon would panic, press the wrong button, the alarms would go off — and somehow, they’d still get away because Bernadette already mailed the painting to their apartment. Penny would post a story like, “Best trip ever!” and the Mona Lisa would be visible in the reflection of her wine glass.

Accident? Yes. Success? Also yes.

Ethically Confused but Weirdly Effective

Eleanor Shellstrop would absolutely justify stealing from the Louvre. “It’s not stealing if it’s for character development,” she’d say.

Chidi would spiral immediately — “But is art theft morally permissible in a capitalist system?” — while Eleanor rolls her eyes and tells him to shut up and grab the statue. Jason would think they’re filming National Treasure 3, and Tahani would keep name-dropping “dear friends Leonardo and Mona.”

But the secret weapon is Janet. One “Not a girl, not a robot” teleport later, and boom — Mona Lisa in the void. No alarms, no witnesses, no ethical debate required.

Michael would still try to turn it into a morality lesson, Eleanor would steal something else out of boredom, and Jason would just be happy he got to press buttons. It would be total chaos, but somehow, they’d all survive and end up eating frozen yogurt in the parking lot.

“Did we just commit a felony?” “Technically, no one exists, so…” “Cool.”

The Hawkins Heist

You know these kids could do it. They’ve fought demogorgons, mind flayers, and puberty. A few lasers and security guards are light work in comparison.

Dustin would build a gadget that disables the entire Louvre’s alarm system using scrap metal and a walkie-talkie. Eleven would just stare at the motion sensors until they exploded. Mike would panic, Lucas would say, “We shouldn’t be doing this,” and Max would be halfway up the wall already.

Meanwhile, Steve would be there in a too-tight Louvre security uniform, saying “This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever agreed to” for the tenth time that hour.

But you know what? They’d do it. They’d run through the museum, adrenaline pumping, synth music blaring, with at least one portal to the Upside Down opening mid-getaway. And by the end, Hopper would drag them all home and yell, “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!” while secretly being proud.

The painting would mysteriously show up in Joyce’s kitchen the next morning. Because Hawkins' logic.

The One-Woman Heist

Georgia doesn’t need a team. She is the plan.

She’d stroll into the Louvre in heels, all smiles, talking her way past security like she owns the place. “Oh, this painting? My ex-husband donated it years ago. So, kind of you to keep it in such good condition.”

The guards would literally thank her for her time.

She’d walk out with the Mona Lisa, three fake passports, and a smile, and by the time anyone figured it out, she’d already be running a café in Amsterdam under a new name.

Georgia Miller doesn’t break laws. She bends reality until the law thinks she’s right. The woman is a gun.

Accidental International Felons

Now this one? Comedy gold.

Picture the Dunphys in Paris. Phil thinks he’s on Amazing Race: Family Edition, Claire is one minor inconvenience away from a meltdown, and the kids are doing everything except what they’re supposed to.

Phil, bless him, would get roped into the robbery by accident. He’d be trying to take a “creative photo” of the Mona Lisa for Instagram, press a button he shouldn’t, and suddenly — glass case open, alarms blaring.

Claire’s yelling “PHIL!” while Luke’s trying to grab the painting because “it’ll look cool in my room.” Haley’s live-streaming, and Alex is researching “how to return stolen art without prison time.”

They’d somehow escape because Jay would know “a guy in Paris,” and Manny would narrate it like a noir film. By the end, the painting would be safely returned, but Phil would be convinced he’s a criminal mastermind.

The Power Move

Francis Underwood doesn’t rob museums; he acquires national treasures through influence.

He would deliver a public speech about “restoring cultural identity” while Claire convinced the French government to “temporarily loan” the Mona Lisa to the U.S. for “diplomatic reasons.”

Six weeks later, it’s hanging in the White House. No break-ins, no alarms, just pure manipulation and power.

Claire would sip wine in front of it during press conferences. Francis would stare at it during meetings as if it’s a mirror. And no one would ever question it.

That’s not theft. That’s domination.

The Sexy Soap Opera Heist

Okay, tell me the Elite crew wouldn’t pull off a Louvre heist like it’s a season finale.

Carla would mastermind it — silk dress, red lipstick, no remorse. Nadia would say she’s against it, then end up saving the team. Ander would be anxious. Guzmán would be pretending he’s fine while clearly not fine. And Samuel would fall for the security guard.

Lu would fund the entire operation “because art deserves luxury,” and every scene would look like a perfume ad. They’d succeed, but not before someone betrays someone else, and at least two people kiss mid-getaway.

And when it’s done? Carla would be sitting in her mansion, sipping champagne, looking at the Mona Lisa and saying, “She gets me.”

Chaos but Make it Couture

Fallon Carrington wouldn’t need to rob the Louvre. She’d buy it out of spite.

But hear me out: she’d still do it — for the drama. She’d put on a diamond-studded catsuit, grab Kirby, Liam, Steven, and Sammy, and call it “a statement on capitalism.”

Kirby would disable the alarms while making it look like a fashion shoot. Liam would be stressed, Steven would handle the PR spin (“It’s philanthropy!”), and Sammy would absolutely be live-tweeting: “We’re in Paris, y’all. No context.”

By morning, Fallon’s face would be on every news outlet, and she’d be loving it. “Who knew a little art appreciation could cause so much fuss?” she’d say in her post-heist confessional.

It wouldn’t just be a robbery. It’d be a press event.

Accidental Espionage

Owen Hendricks would think he’s on a regular mission until Max Meladze says, “We’re robbing the Louvre.”

He’d panic for an hour, fall through a skylight, accidentally outsmart six CIA agents, and still end up looking cool. Max would calmly sip espresso, manipulate three governments, and leave the country before sunrise.

By the time anyone realises what happened, Owen’s back at work pretending he doesn’t know anything.

Somehow, it works. Don’t ask how.

Let’s be honest, everyone here would make it interesting. But winning isn’t just about chaos. It’s about style, precision, and pure power.

And that’s why the winners are the Mikaelsons.

All of them. Klaus, Elijah, Rebekah, Kol, Freya, and even daggered Finn. They’ve got the power, the brains, the drama, and the immortality. The Louvre would never stand a chance.

They wouldn’t just steal art. They’d become art.

And I swear I’m not biased. Not biased at all… I mean, okay, maybe a little. But no matter how many shows you watch, you can never take a TVD Universe fan out of your system. It’s just science.

Meet Dave is a Master of Commerce (Extension) student studying Marketing and Human Resource Management who occasionally writes. When he’s not pulling life lessons out of TV characters, which, let’s be honest, is most of the time, you’ll find him solving sudoku, doomscrolling, studying, or convincing himself he doesn’t need another coffee.