Talking About Asexuality

By Liam Ho

The LGBTQ+ community is a large and varied one full of interesting and diverse people. Even though Pride Month is over, it's important to talk about aspects of the community throughout the year. So I’d like to introduce you to one of the lesser known aspects of the community, Asexuality. 

Asexuality for me

I myself identify as an Asexual. For me Asexuality helped me identify myself with others and helped me understand that I wasn’t broken for feeling different. I’m a sex neutral ace (asexual person) and have always felt indifferent or uninterested in sex. A good analogy that I’ve heard for asexuality is that sex is like a great new series on Netflix, and everyone talks about how great it is. The only thing is that I don’t have a Netflix subscription, and just pretend to talk about how good the show is. 

What is Asexuality?

Asexuality as a simple definition is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in desire for sexual activity. Asexuality represents about 1% of the population and therefore is relatively unheard of and misunderstood by others. 

Questioning about being Asexual

If you’ve felt a similar way that I have, where you’ve just not felt an interest in sex or sexual activity. It could be possible you could be asexual. Just like other sexualities, it can take time to truly figure out how you feel and the process can be confusing. The ace community however, is very accepting of everyone on the asexual spectrum, even those who are questioning. 

Misconceptions about Asexuality

Asexuality means an individual lacks sexual attraction to others, however:

  1. Asexuals can still have romantic relationships with other individuals.

  2. Asexuals can still have sex with other individuals, asexuality doesn’t necessarily mean one has an aversion to sex.

  3. Asexuality and celibacy are not the same thing. 

  4. Asexual people can have a libido like regular people, they just don’t feel the need to act out on it.

  5. Are valid and have nothing wrong with them.

Sex in the Asexual community

There are varying views about sex within the asexual community, with each individual having their own opinion. There are sex positive asexuals, asexuals who are okay with having sex and enjoy it. There are sex neutral asexuals, who feel indifferent about sex and don’t mind having it. There are also sex repulsed asexuals, who feel physically repulsed by the idea of sex and have no interest in it at all. 

Any resources for Asexual people

There are a good couple of resources for those who are unsure or would like to find out more. Reddit is a particularly good resource which has a whole bunch of different links and individuals who may feel the same way. Alongside that, the Twitter account linked below is of an older asexual man who posts up really great advice for ace people specifically. 

(a forum for asexual individuals to access likeminded topics and questions and communicate with others within the community)

(The Twitter account of a popular asexual creator, writer and educator)

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