Worst UNSW Zoom Fails

By Carla Fischer

Image by Elisa Ventur on Unsplash

Now that some of us are back to face to face classes, I think it is time to reminisce on the last two years of online classes, and what better way to do such than a compilation of awkward online moments such as accidentally messaging the wrong person...

  • “I’m from USYD but this was during the beginning of zoom so it was new to everyone, but basically the tutor asked a question to the class and a female student answered but then the tutor’s wife stormed in the room he was in and the door slammed opened and she yelled 'WHO YOU TALKING TO?? YOU CHEATING ON ME!?' Then he immediately ended the zoom. Maybe he was cheating in some other form and his instincts set in to end the call immediately"
  • “I touched myself during online lectures.”
  • “I farted while in an online class right after I answered a question and I tried to play it off like oops my chair is so squeaky”
  • “So, my video was off, and I was furiously rubbing one out to OnlyFans. As the lecturer droned on in the background, I was really getting into it. I was alone in the house so felt free to make a ruckus, moan a little. As the dam burst its walls and the river burst its banks, I yelled out, 'YES BELLE DELPHINE, PEG ME MUMMY PEG ME' and screamed a guttural, primate scream from the depths of my soul. To find that my audio was on the whole time. For a moment, the class was completely silent -- before absolutely exploding in total hysterics. Fuck. My. Life. - Mark”
  • “I asked a question in a zoom lec and then I forgot to mute my mic and I BURPED SOOO LOUD THE UGLIEST BURP LIKE ALMOST VOMIT BURP RIGHT INTO THE MIC AND IT WASN'T MUTED!!! THE LECTURER WAS LIKE uhhhhhh and I apologized saying I was sick AND IT WAS RECORDED FOR THE WHOLE CLASS.”
  • “I brought my laptop into the kitchen to make myself some lunch while my lecture was going and I'd made some pasta the night before for dinner and wanted the leftovers for lunch but my brother had eaten it so I yelled out you 'dickhead cunt why'd you eat my pasta' he went back 'I was hungry' so I went 'fair'. And then it was quiet for a bit i.e. no lecturer speaking and I said 'Ah shit but my Ah shits are like ahhhhhh shiiittttt' in a very monotone fashion.”
  • “My friend thought she was DMing me during a tute but forgot to change who was receiving the message and accidentally messaged the whole online class about how hot the tutor was.”
  • “In the first lecture of the course one of the lecturers (someone doing their PHDs) was pretty young so I wrote as a joke "mmm <<lecturer>> lookin like a snacc
  • “Once I was in a tutorial that didn't automatically mute us, so when the professor asked, 'Does anyone have any questions?' I deadpan muttered 'No not really' to which he awkwardly laughed and said 'okay…' I wanted to ✨pass away✨ -Alexa”
  • “Asked my Google Home a bunch of questions during someone else's presentation.”
  • “Well there was this one time I was playing a game on my PC while I was in a zoom call and my mic was unmuted the whole time so the whole class and teacher heard all of me being toxic af. At one point I just yelled 'fuck off kient...' then the boys texted me saying my mic was on. - Dharsshen X Sunther"
  • “I was tutoring a course in the school of computer science (online via MS teams) and one time during a lab, i was doing my best to explain a concept and someone accidentally left their mic on and (was clearly on the phone to a friend or something) said loudly; 'Yeah, i don't fucking understand any of this shit.'As the tutor I had to appear professional and pretend like nothing happened but deep down I was trying hard not to laugh..."
  • “Some girl in my lecture had left her microphone on after she had answered a question in class. About 1 minute later, the class hears a wet, trickling sound and a toilet flushing. The girl had gone to the bathroom during the lecture!.”
  • “Went to the toilet holding my laptop. Thought the sound was off. It was not.”
  • “Some dude went to the bathroom mid zoom and forgot to turn his camera off... dw you couldn't see anything R18+... but we definitely saw him chillin' on his seat until someone managed to notify him 3 minutes in... He proceeded to leave the chat thereafter.”

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Anandi Ganguly