BY Nina Greenhill

One strategy is to simply embrace the madness. 

You’ve got the time and opportunity to do this. You’ve also got time to patch yourself up after it and re-enter society without anyone being the wiser.

If you prefer to go with a more combative approach, I can suggest the following:

1.     Go to the Zoo

That’s right. One way to stay sane is to wake up really early, make yourself some sandwiches and put them in that lunchbox (cause no way are you going to pay for expensive zoo food on your student budget), pack your water bottle in your bag, and take that permanent marker so you can mark off all the animals you see on your printed-out map.

Remember to clip your car keys to the inside of your backpack, apply that sunscreen, and put on your walking shoes.

Now the hard part- you need to travel all the way to your laptop or flatscreen, open https://taronga.org.au/taronga-tv and watch the keeper talks, the live cams and the seal show and penguin feed.

2. Treat Yourself: Host a Fancy Dinner Party for One

This one requires preparation. Remember that each course you plan, needs a very specific set of skills, such as cooking, and drink pouring.

Some common courses to include are: bread/appetiser, soup, main, cheese plate, dessert.

Each course requires you to have a different set of cutlery, a different glass, candles for the table (don’t lie and say you didn’t buy any from IKEA pre-covid, or got some delivered), and of course, everything placed on your table for your four other guests. If you lack the skills to cook your fancy dinner, remember, you’re only serving yourself food, so you can get that premade soup, microwave meal, and a yogo tub. Put it in actual crockery and watch it transform into something worthy of the tablecloth you ironed for the occasion.

Don’t forget your napkin! Below is a successfully performed Dinner for One. – Don’t worry. The intro is in German, but the video is in English.

3.   Whenever I’m Bored, I Travel Abroad!

It’s time to live your best travel life. What you need to do is very simple. You need to get dressed for the place you’re going. This means embracing the local aesthetic and culture and using your creativity and imagination. Don’t have cultural dress? Well, you can make a kimono (commit to the cause) or do your very best and use the curtains for a toga, or simply slap on that Hawaiian shirt you got from Lowes. Deep dive into your trip research, and march out of your house, and into your outside cubicle/house/shed and get picked up by a zeppelin that will kidnap you to Neuschwanstein Castle. *

*Do ensure you have a flying car to rescue you when you land in enemy territory. Don’t forget snacks and a cuppa for the trip.

4. Make a New Friend

Requires: Volleyball or another sportball, sharp implement, Hair for your Wilson (long grass, branches/twigs), hot glue/glue/clay, and paint.

Step One: Collect your materials. Keep in mind you’re gonna insert the hair into the ball, so pick your materials long, you can always give Wilson a haircut later.

Step Two: Cut a hole in the top of your sportball.

Step Three: Glue ‘Hair’ into the hole you’ve just created.

Step Four: Put your handprint onto the ball using the paint. Try and make it a face.

Remember: All Wilson’s are beautiful.

Treat your Wilson with care.

5.   Take a Break and Embrace the Imperfect

This is a tough time and please take a break. Take time for yourself. If you know how to overload yourself (like I do) you know that time to yourself is important.

De-stress by:

  • Allowing yourself some slack
  • Spending a day going down a rabbit hole of your favourite Drarry fanfics
  • Rearranging your bookshelf
  • Spending your time making that apple pie recipe that you are going to perfect by the time this whole situation is over. I tried making one and I can confidently say I made apple crumble. Pie pastry is difficult.

You don’t have to be perfect. You are allowed to grieve for all the moments and life you’re missing. You’re allowed to have a break- have a seat on your nature strip and have an iced tea. Spend the day designing a whole new environment for your cat to explore inside.

It’s a stressful moment in time for all of us. Even if your breaktime is 5 mins, it’s for you and you deserve it.

Build that pillow fort and make that milkshake- bring all the boys to your fence 1.5 metres apart. If you’re looking for a laugh- I suggest Monty Python.

And remember:

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