By Joanna Ng

There’s no denying that the computer game ‘The Sims’ brings out the worst in people. It’s an experimental playground for curious minds to push the limits of social norms in a contained false reality. Because individual Sim worlds are a private business, it’s a breeding ground for exploring psychopathic avenues and evil tendencies. 

The first instalment of ‘The Sims’ was released in 2000 and has since had numerous patches, updates, versions and expansion packs.However, the later versions pale in comparison to the nostalgia and malicious glee of the original edition of ‘The Sims’. It was a game that gave a kid with limited control over their own life total control of adults. It’s an invitation for curious irresponsibility or a recipe for disaster.

Forgive Me For I Have Simmed

“Treat others as you would like to be treated” is so far removed from the Simoleon world it’s virtually non-existent. All avid players of ‘The Sims’ have at some point been so brazened by the God complex that Sim folk have been forced into troubling OH&S failings. Yet somehow, these acts of evil are considered so hilarious and honourable that they are recycled over and over. Here’s a list of popular deeds in ‘The Sims’ that most players have done to Sims, that we’d never want to happen to us.

All Doors Down

Whether it be removing the door to the bathroom after three plates of food or trapping the Sim in a claustrophobic space, it’s still funny to see Sim characters overreact and plead for rescue. Cruel factor: 2000 Simoleons.

Stairway To Nowhere

After all these years it’s still amusing to march Sims up a flight of stairs only to remove them once they reach the top. Oh the joys of pause, fast-forward and immediate infrastructure.

Cruel factor: 2000 Simoleons

Like stairs, essential ladders are another fun experiment. Repeat the above with a pool rung in an environment conducive to death by exhaustion. Fantastic.

Cruel factor: 4000 Simoleons

Talk Is Cheap

While this is not exactly an act of cruelty, continual badgering of your fellow Sim neighbours in the middle of the night with phone calls is not very nice. There’s a kick in watching your Sim’s relationships suffer from the verbal abuse they receive. It’s common knowledge acquaintances in this game are a necessity, not a choice, but who needs friends anyway?

Cruel factor: 1000 Simoleons.

Breaking Up Bad

Speaking of relationships, ‘The Sims’ can be viewed as a sandbox to conduct psychotic social experiments. It’s scary what inappropriate real-world scenarios you can get away with in the Simoleon world. Examples include breaking up with someone by having an affair right in front of them, or forcing your Sim into a ‘lover’s’ house only to divorce and evict them from their own home.

Cruel factor: 5000 Simoleons

All Work And No Play

Work is overrated. But unless you plan to cheat your way through the game with rosebuds, you need money. Such is life. So why not create a house where one Sim is an avid painter recluse who finances the entire household from a blocked off one-star motel room? This Sim never sees the light of day and no one in the house has a clue.

Cruel factor: 3000 Simoleons.

Thou Shall Not Eat!

It’s never nice when others eat your food. But it’s hilarious when it’s your Sim and your Sim is starving to the brink of death. Especially when they wave for your attention out of desperation. Meanwhile, your God complex is so sky high that you leave the food to get cold and collect flies. In this game, and in life, withholding food is toying with death.

Cruel factor: 5000 Simoleons.

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